How to Tell if Your Girlfriend Is Cheating on You

Is my girlfriend cheating on me? Here some signs she's cheating on you with someone else.
by Updated January 7, 2013

Trust is a big factor in a relationship; it can make or break it. If you’re beginning to feel something different towards your girlfriend, it can open a can of worms and you might end up mistrusting your girlfriend unnecessarily. However, you would want to know if your suspicions are correct, so here are some tips on how to confirm if your girlfriend is already cheating on you.

  1. Pause and think: why do you think she’s cheating? Is it more of a gut feeling or do you have evidence to prove it? Recall how much you trust your girlfriend and think if she is capable of cheating. Does she often lie or were there instances when you can’t tell whether she’s telling the truth or not? Has her routine changed recently and you can’t tell what she’s been up to when you’re not together?
  2. Observe how your girlfriend acts around you and others.
    1.  Is there any odd change in behavior? Does she text or call you less often? If you are always the one calling or texting her first recently, that doesn’t look good. When you’re together and someone calls, does she leave the room just to be polite? If she doesn’t want you to hear her phone conversations unlike before, then something’s going on.
    2. Look at how your girlfriend dresses up. If she’s starting to go about worrying about her looks more than usual, this is a sign that she’s trying to look good for another person. She might have always wanted to dress up for you, but it’s something else if she wants to pretty herself up even more when she goes out without you.
    3. If your girlfriend begins to become more argumentative or picks fights more, you might want to look into that as well. She might even use this as an excuse to go out of the house more often. It’s always easy to pick a fight and then leave you to spend time with someone else.
    4. Lies are always something you have to consider, especially when you try to look at the timeframes and there is something strange after you connect the dots.
    5. You might also notice that she spends more time on the PC than usual. Adult chat rooms are all over the internet and it’s very easy to find another person to spend time with.
    6. Your friends seem to be acting weird and jumpy around you. This can be a sign that they know something that you don’t: your girlfriend is cheating on you and you are the last person to know.
    7. Your girlfriend is accusing you of cheating: the exact same thing that she is guilty of. She might drop hints of you having an affair when in fact, she’s the one having it.
  3. Try to test how your girlfriend reacts when you express affection towards her. When you tell her you love her, does she say it back? When you try to hold her hand, does she avoid it or does she look nervous or uncomfortable? If you’ve always been affectionate towards each other and she’s suddenly reacting differently, then something is definitely wrong.
  4. If your girlfriend seems to act normally around you, try to recall her past relationships. How many times has she cheated on her previous boyfriends? If she has that type of history, then cheating might be something that she’s already comfortable with.
  5. Communication is another important aspect of a relationship, so you can try to talk to your girlfriend about your true feelings. Ask to talk to her and tell her how you are feeling; avoid outright accusations like, ”I know you’re cheating!” and use something more expressive of your feelings like, “I feel that you’re not as interested in our relationship as before.” Observe how she responds. She will give you an equally straightforward response if she’s not cheating. On the other hand, she might talk in circles, become defensive or even accuse you of being the cheater; then you know your fears are most probably real.
  6. Your gut feel may be the most reliable thing. When you have gathered sufficient evidence, your next step is to follow your gut. You cannot deny something that is already proven without reasonable doubt.
  7. Do not blame yourself for what happened because in this case, it is the cheater who failed in the relationship. There are so many reasons to break up with someone but there is only a single reason to cheat. If you failed in the relationship, then the cheater should’ve broken up with you, not cheated on you. If someone cheated on you, then she has a problem and not you.


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