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Why do Woman Go Back to Abusive Relationships?

Why would a Women who's in an Abusive Relationship take back the Abuser?  In general, why do women stay in abusive relationships?


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It is hard to understand why woman stay with abusive partners or why woman continue to return to violent situations. Objectively speaking, it seems rational to leave such a relationship and start a new life, but there are complex reasons why woman stay. The primary explanation is fear. Often woman fear that their partners will react even more ruthlessly if they do not return to their relationship. Studies have also shown that aggressive men who abuse their spouses become increasingly more intimidating once their partner chooses to leave.

Moreover when children are involved, the situation is worsened. The abuser can use the children as ammunition against the woman. For example, he can accuse her of not wanting their children to have a father and for being a bad mother as a result of breaking up the family. Also, without two parents, the abuser can argue that financially the children cannot be supported.

In terms of finances, with or without children, many women feel vulnerable without the financial support from their abuser. As abusive relationships take a toll on the confidence of a woman, she may feel inadequate and believe that she is unable to support herself independently. Fearing financial helplessness, women tend to return to their abusers to ensure financial safety.

In some situations, the abuser can manipulate the woman to feel sorry for him. A typical approach is for the abuser to bring up suicide. It is common for the abuser to lead the woman to believe that without her companionship he could seriously hurt himself as there would be no point to life. Equally as often, the man will try to convince the woman that he can change and will do everything he can to better the situation because he loves her. Although the sentiment may be truthful, it is almost guaranteed that the abuse will continue unless the abuser seeks professional help.

Statistically speaking, there are many false breakups before a battered woman leaves her abuser for good. Because abused woman lack confidence, live in fear, and are overwhelmed with helplessness, it takes several attempts before she can break away. This is a struggle that most battered women face, however with the help of support groups and victim shelters, women can get the help they need and live an abuse free life.
Sep 22nd, 2012 at 7:04 PM
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