How to Fall Out of Love with Someone

Simple steps you can take to help you Fall Out of Love.
by Updated October 17, 2012

I bet you thought you found the one.  That the two of you were perfect for each other and that you would be together forever.  Unfortunately this is not the hand you were dealt, and now you’re left to fend for yourself and rebuild. You’re probably thinking that you’ll never find another partner, but let me assure you this is not the end.

Below are some helpful tips to guide you back on track.  These guidelines will sever the emotional connections you have in order for you to start a new life. 

1) Think of reasons why the relationship ended and write them down.  Without a doubt, the first reason should be because they’re not in love with you anymore.  Although this may hurt, it is the truth and you deserve someone better.  An item on the list can include that the two of you were simply not suitable for one another.  Now that your love goggles are removed, recall all the arguments you’ve had and ask yourself why there were so many disagreements to begin with.  Recall the lack of attention, disloyalty and whatever else that made you feel unimportant and write them down. 

2)  Eliminate all items in your life that remind you of them. You can mail the items to your former partner, burn them, or just throw them out.  Regardless, get rid of all of it. 

3) Physically get away.  It’s not healthy to see the person or be near them when trying to get over a relationship.  Take this time to contemplate your life without influence and avoid situations where you may see them.  If you must call them for work related situations, don’t be too keen to call them back right away.  Take a few days and make sure you have a reason to hang up the phone after you’ve said what you’ve needed to say. 

4) Train yourself to not think about them.  Catch yourself in the act and stop it immediately!  Find a distraction and redirect your thoughts elsewhere.  Listen to a nearby conversation, pick up a magazine, or simply call a friend.  Whatever your tactic, it’s important that you stop.  This may feel strange at first, but over time the thought of them will eventually end and you’ll be able to move on. 

5) Go out and be yourself.  Maybe your ex-partner didn’t like shopping or golfing.  Well guess what?  Now you’re free to do whatever you want and whenever you want.  Now that they’re out of the picture, this is the best time to pursue your interests.  You don’t have to consult with anyone or ask permission.  Just go do it!

6)  Go out and make friends.  One great way to get back on your feet is to get out there and make friends.  Attending social events is a great way to do this.  If you like books, go to a book signing, or if you like golf, go to a golf show.  Whatever you do, make sure you don’t fall for someone too quickly.  Rebound relationships are a bad idea.

7)  Know that you will always care.  At one point in your life you were emotionally connected to this person so it’s natural to always have feelings for them.  Because of this, there is potential for a friendship in the future, but just be mindful of boundaries.   You don’t want to start something that you know will end badly. 



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